Fray
Asche
NOTE: For those who have gone through this job quest…yes I rewrote some of it, mostly because I thought it fit better with Asche’s experience if I tweaked it a bit.
I hesitated at the top of the stairs. Midgardsormr’s silence bothered me. He hovered nearby but no comments. No direction. Either way, I wasn’t going to let these knights just leave this man’s body in the brume for others to plunder. It was wrong and disrespectful. Even as a Wood Warden of Atoel Village, I had been taught to respect the kills.
Before plundering Adventurers stumbling into the wrong part of the jungle. Then no one gave them respect for they didn’t respect us.
My ire was up. I was already irritated at these knights’ actions and was ready to say something. But as I neared, I caught a snippet of their conversation.
“….that’s more than far enough for charity. They’ll take care of the rest,” one of them said, though I couldn’t tell which. An Ishgardian’s helm hid everything about their face, save for their eyes.
The two knights turned to look at me as I approached. “…and mayhap sooner rather than later. Come on,” and the two of them hurried down the secondary steps and into the brume.
I balled my hands into fists as these honorable knights just left the body on the steps. I shook my head before kneeling down before him. He sat with his body bent forward and after a few seconds, I knelt before him and reached out to touch his neck with my fingers, to check for a pulse.
But even as I touched his cold skin, something icy and red bled out around him and turned into black and red smoke. It engulfed me for a moment—there was a thud in my mind, and I put my hand to my head and closed my eyes. I was drowning in red…the deep red of anger.
There was a voice in my mind. It was deep, mature, and had an almost mournful tone to it. In the dark, it spoke, …is this it? Is this all that awaits?
As I felt myself drowning in this red miasma, I also knew that some part of me was being pulled away, and I was losing consciousness as it weakened me. It was taking my will, my thoughts…my…
No…No more. Enough…
Open your eyes. Look. Do you see now? Do you see?
I…I was drowning, falling, unable to stop. There was were no sides in this hole of anger, frustration, rage. I felt as if I were pitching forward, lost in the darkness.
I…could hear my name, but it was so hard to move out of that darkness. It felt as if I were trying to climb up a muddy bank, away from a fast-moving river that wanted to pull me under.
Finally I came out, and I was gasping as I forced my eyes open and saw…
My vision cleared and I realized I was still kneeling, and this fighter…this man who’d been slumped over a second ago, now stood over me.
I could see gold eyes looking down at me, looking out of the darkness of his helm. In the Ishgardian tradition, the rest of his face was hidden. I was shocked to see him up…and easily standing and I was having a hard time standing.
I thought…or had I imagined it, that I didn’t feel a pulse.
He spoke through the helm. “I’ve been waiting on you to open your eyes. You all right? You were moaning in your sleep and sweating buckets besides.”
Moaning…in my sleep? I’m kneeling. I couldn’t have been asleep. I…what the hell just happened? “What…” I croaked and coughed before I tried that again. “What…did you do to me?”
He reached down and offered me his armored hand. I stared at it, not wanting to trust it…but I didn’t trust myself at that moment to stand on my own. I was afraid I would fall forward.
I hesitantly took it. The metal was ice cold, and he pulled me to my feet. I staggered a bit, and he held my shoulders as I got my bearings.
Shit…I was dizzy.
He didn’t answer my question. But continued on conversationally. “Name’s Fray, by the way. And no, I’m not a heretic.”
I pulled my hand from his and put it to my forehead, still in a bit of a fog. “I…I didn’t say you were. I’m not sure…what a heretic is.” I took in a deep breath and straightened up…sort of. I lowered my hand. “You’re a knight. How can a knight be a heretic?”
“Hey,” Fray said. “Try convincing a Temple Knight drunk on authority of that, eh? Shame the pompous arse got the better of me.” He watched me with those strange eyes. “But how about you? You touched it, yes? That couldn’t have felt good.”
Touched… “Touched what?”
Again he didn’t answer my question but waited for me to say something. Fine. “I…don’t know what I touched. I…felt as if I were being drained of my strength…and heard a panicked voice.”
Fray chuckled. “A voice eh? And a rather distressed one besides…”
At that moment, someone yelled out to the left. We both turned to look deeper into the brume.
“Please, someone—anyone!”
I started to head down the stairs—until a large sword was crossed in front of me.
I turned to see that Fray was holding his sword, the one the Ishgardian man had described outside the Tribunal. It was huge, and not something even I believed I could wield with only one hand. I stepped back and looked over at him, and he was boring those unnatural eyes into me.
“Not so fast,” Fray said. “We need to talk about what’s happening to you—what’s growing within you, before you get carried away.”
I stared at him, not quite comprehending what he was talking about. “Growing…inside of me?” I said in a low voice.
Fray kept his sword in front of me, barring my way. “There’s a darkness within us all—nothing dangerous, mind. In fact, it’s quite healthy. But the crystal changes you—gives you the power to channel that darkness. It can be used for any purpose you choose, but if you’re not strong enough, it will choose.”
I blinked. Crystal?
I started to touch the sword as the voice called out again for help. I looked at Fray and stopped—slightly terrified of what I saw.
“Do it without proper training, however, and…well…it might hurt.”
I blinked and the red glow was gone. I rubbed my eyes. What had I just seen? “What…what are you talking about?”
He lowered his sword but didn’t move it away. “Asche…go ahead—ask me to teach you. Ask me to instruct you in the ways of the dark knights, and I will.”
Wait…
I stepped back again, staring at him. Dark Knights. That was the term that man used outside the Tribunal. A term he seemed very afraid of speaking, especially out loud. I had no idea what a Dark Knight was. All I had to go on was what that man said about a knight using a large sword, and I was facing that man down right then. My head was pounding and my heart racing.
I—I wasn’t sure I wanted anything to do with this person. I swallowed and bit my lower lip. “Why?”
“Why?” Fray shook his head. “Because of what I said—it’s already growing inside of you. You need the training, or you might not…survive.”
I shook my head and lowered my shoulders. “After what I’ve been through, the betrayal I barely survived—no,” I pointed at the ground with my right index finger. “Actually, I didn’t survive. That betrayal killed me, and I came back from death, only to feel the hurt and the humiliation that kind of…of…” I lost my words. I was suddenly swimming—no, drowning—in the frustration, hate, rage and indignation I’d been feeling since I woke in that little room in Dragonhead.
“I will survive…” I said in a dark, deep voice I didn’t realize I had. It was full of anger. Hatred. And resentment.
Fray nodded slowly. “The crystal knows, Asche. That’s why it’s calling to you. It feels your rage, your hate, your resentment, your darkness…” he moved in close, and his words reverberated in my head. “It wants your power, Asche. And it will have it, and you, if I don’t train you to control it.”
He re-sheathed his sword by bringing it over his shoulder to his back and it stayed there. Maybe there was a magnet in his gear? “Asche…listen to me. I know. And I can sense the suppressed rage you’re feeling. It called out to the crystal, and it demands…you.”
It finally dawned on me that the crystal he was talking about was a soul crystal. He produced one and held out the red jewel. “I know you’re still worried about that screaming woman, so I’ll keep this brief.”
He was close to me. Too close and his eyes locked with mine and I couldn’t…look away. I was too…tired. “We dark knights don’t care one whit for prestige or pedigree. We are free to follow our hearts—to defend the weak and punish the guilty as we see fit. Not by any other law.”
He continued. I…couldn’t…move… “The law of the land? The authority of a name? These are tools cowards use to escape harm. We have no need of shields, figurative or literal.”
To my surprise he unsheathed his sword again and held it out to me, the grip up. In his other hand he still held that soul crystal. “Here—my blade is your blade; my soul crystal is your crystal. Go on…take them. You’ll need them soon enough. I can no longer house the crystal. It wants you.”
I tore my gaze from those eyes and looked down like a man in a trance. I didn’t want the crystal, or the hilt of that sword…but I couldn’t stop myself as I reached out and took both. The crystal instantly bonded with me, and I felt my body go ridged. It was unlike the other fusing’s to soul crystals I already had, such as Dragoon and Paladin. This was harsh, and painful, and I rocked back, and then forward as I stared at the worn, frozen wood beneath my boots as I used the large sword to keep standing.
After a few minutes, the woman yelled out again, and I held up the sword, amazed that I could use my right hand and arm to support the blade. The main balance was on my right side, so when I turned away from Fray and swung the sword, my left hand came to the hilt to naturally finish the carry—
And my elbow didn’t hurt. It didn’t grind or slow. It was as if…it’d never been poisoned.
When I looked back at Frey, he was watching me with those…eyes. “Well, well, don’t you look the part. Ready to harness the darkness within to set the wrong things right.” These weren’t questions, but statements. Facts.
I did feel abruptly ready…even with no idea how I was supposed to use this great sword in battle.
Fray held up his hand. “Now, bear in mind that while the darkness gives you strength, that strength comes at a cost. That is but one sacrifice, though—and justice demands many.”
I stared at him. “What…what sacrifice?”
But he ignored me and continued to talk. I was torn between answering the call that came from inside the brume, to listening to this stranger who had answers I believed I needed.
“Say a man—” Fray said. “A venerable, untouchable man—harms a child in unspeakable ways. He strides through the Hoplon, secure in the knowledge that he is beyond punishment. But for one who cuts down that vile beast as he flaunts his freedom, there is punishment, and condemnation. But the bigger question is where is justice? Who knows how many others will suffer if this untouchable man continues to live? Such was the dilemma faced by a goodly knight long ago. He knew that he would be stripped of his titles and denounced for the deed. But he would save others the world forgot.”
I looked down, at the sword, and put my left hand to my chest. How many have I killed—ordered to, paid to, destroy the ones deemed evil or unjust? And what of those lost lives in the Waking Sands? Those friends whom I had found murdered, dead in their own blood—when the murderer was none other than that woman—Livia sas Junius—because the Echo had shown me her crimes? How many prevented me from leaving and hunting that bitch down?
All of them! How many more died as she continued to live? And oh how happy I was when I cut her down in Castrum—
It was justice!
I felt myself a bit dizzy as the cry sounded again and I staggered. I put my left hand to my forehead. These thoughts…I always had them. I’d been a ruthless killer and defender in my home, protecting my brothers, and the women. But these were thoughts and feelings I kept inside. Maybe confessing them once or twice to Lorelei.
And yet they were so close to the surface now…I had to wonder…was my illness, my weakness, a way to keep me away from those I might hurt if I went out to seek my own justice? Did I not have a right to avenge the ones who did not deserve such deaths? What about the innocents, unable to defend themselves?
What am I? Was this the question that lurked in my mind? A hero, or a killer? Are they one and the same?
Teledji Adedeji’s voice came back to me then, accusing me of regicide. Of everyone’s gazes turning from me…
“Asche,” Fray was close now, so close against me. “The threshold we refuse to cross is a line we draw for ourselves. We fear the consequences, and people suffer for our indecision. But everyone who held that crystal came to conquer that fear and became who they wanted to be. That knight was the first. Will you be the next? Will you conquer your fears and indecision? Can you make that choice?”
He turned away. “Think on that while we look into the commotion down below. Sometimes being thrown into the…fray…is the best experience a dark knight can have.”
NEXT: My first fight as a Dark Knight—against the Tribunal Knights.